Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
