So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
