it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
