I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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