Sry I called you an 8
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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