he wants to bone in the snuggie
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
