you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize