She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
