i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Drunk is not a location!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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