I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
