idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I believe in your delicious
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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