Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
