i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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