What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Randomize
