Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize