i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
