Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
