Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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