yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize