i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
