Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize