i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
