My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I would fuck him just for his dog
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
