we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize