I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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