I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize