Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
