You work out of a Hotel?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
