Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
