Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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