Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i drank out of a bidet.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize