Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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