Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
