Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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