I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
