doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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