i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize