Just fell off a train. Bad.
now i know why i became what i already was.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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