i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
