i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
