Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
i think my cat just said my name.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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