Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
