If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
