Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
