Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize