Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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