I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
