one might say we're banned from that church
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
