i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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