i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
