problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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